


r/greentext be me

by LyraLeTrash



Series: The highest form of observation haki is gaydar [3]
Category: One Piece
Genre: Internalized Homophobia, M/M, green text be me, listen its gay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-30
Updated: 2019-10-30
Packaged: 2021-01-12 22:03:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,397
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21233282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LyraLeTrash/pseuds/LyraLeTrash
Summary: fuck fuck please don't be gay, I don't want to be gay. What does this mean?





	r/greentext be me

The second the straw hats were tied off at the new island they were gone. An outsider would say they were akin to rats how they scattered so instantaneously. Most of the time they decided who had to stay and guard the ship with a game of some sort. Sometimes it was as simple as, _the_ _ last one is the rotten egg _. This was one of those times. Luffy is gone in an instant launching himself towards whatever direction smelt like food. Sanji happens to have an advantage with running, his long legs used to the physical exertion. Though his speed is slowed down by a very content Nami he held bridal style. Usopp's gimmick was a cheap trick using the impact dial he had from Skypeia to send himself flying aiming straight for the island's main attraction, a large inflatable bouncy Castle. And who knew Franky has jetpacks. Robin certainly did as she made her place on Franky’s shoulder bringing chopper along with her. Brook is clever and figures if he jumps off the side of the boat and walked over the water to the port he immediately counts as out. So all that was left was Zoro. Fast asleep underneath a tangerine tree. 

What could he say it was a good spot and if it counts for anything, he had an amazing nap.

\---

“Oi Mossball! Wake up.” 

He felt a distinct kick to his stomach that would have had a weaker man hurling. Instead, Zoro dry-heaved his hand grabbing the offending limb. He only realized after he was ready to twist it off that it belonged to an unphased Sanji. His crew was full of cheap shots, weren't they?

The chef seemed ready to follow up in order to convince the Mossman to release but Zoro got the idea pretty quickly. He let go and threw Sanji a sharp glare. His perpetrator demonstrated his aloof demeanor by readjusting his suit and lighting a cigarette. 

He didn't say anything for awhile taking a drag of his cigarette and blowing it out a couple of times and Zoro’s blood was running thin. 

“IF YOU GOT SOMETHING TO SAY THEN SAY IT.” 

He couldn't help the shout and he wasn't sure if he wanted to.

“I got a huge haul in town and I need your help bringing it aboard”

Another puff of smoke gone to the wind. 

“THAT'S WHAT YOU KICKED ME FOR? GO ASK SOMEONE ELSE I'M NOT HELPING YOU FOR SHIT.” 

“NO ONE ELSE IS HERE YET AND EVEN IF THEY WERE I WOULDN'T ASK THEM, THIS IS THE ONLY THING YOU’RE GOOD FOR SO GET TO WORK.”

“IM NOT SOME FUCKING PACK MULE YOU CAN-”

“ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THAT? BECAUSE IM NOT”

“DO YOU WANNA FIGHT SWIRLY BROW? ILL BEAT YOUR FUCKING ASS.”

“I’D LIKE TO SEE YOU TRY TURF HEAD.”

He was gonna kill him one day. And was gonna fucking enjoy it. 

\---

He doesn't know why he got stuck with this. He distinctly said no, and yet still, he ended up helping Sanji. The boxes weren't that heavy. Twenty-one of them in total all sealed tight with different aromas wafting out of them. Vaguely he could remember Sanji taunting him, making a remark of how " I can do it faster than you" and that he was "scared to lose". And even though he wasn’t counting, he was in the lead with his 12th box stored into the kitchen. Zoro didn't know exactly where they went, so they were mostly thrown on the floor, _ but _ he was still winning. And he was taking pride in that. 

When he swung the door open, his plan was to go get more crates maybe five or so this time just to really show off, but then he hit Sanji smack dab in the face. And suddenly nothing was more important than watching him fall while he desperately tried to keep his balance _ and _not drop the boxes. He failed. It was funny as all fuck. 

There Sanji laid three crates of food scattered around him, (still tightly sealed, if Zoro thought they would open he would have caught them. He knows how Sanji feels about wasting food) with ears red from embarrassment or anger. The turf head could see the shout forming on his lips as he slowly got up. Zoro was going to help him, and pick up the stuff too, but there are priorities. Sanji kicked him earlier, and as aggressive as their relationship was it was always fair.

Leaning over Sanji’s fallen form he grinned, letting out a simple remark. 

"Don't be such a silly little boy." 

He was expecting a lot of things with that comment. A kick, a shout, Sanji seriously trying to murder him. More kicking. A kick so hard it would throw him overboard. Ok, he was mostly expecting a flurry of kicks by a very embarrassed Sanji. A part of him was thriving at the thought, wanting the adrenaline rush he got so often during their more serious fights. The other part noticed how almost immediately after he made the comment Sanji snapped his head to look at him with his pupils blown wide and mouth slightly agape.

That part started to take the main stage as he felt a heavy wave of lust waft off of Sanji.

Oh.

It was intense, practically suffocating, most unexpected arousals were. It was taking all of his will to not let it affect him. 

But then Sanji practically whined and Zoro couldn't break eye contact. He was still on the ground looking up at him his blue eyes holding Zoro captive. 

Zoro had the feeling that this would have continued on and maybe lead to something, but suddenly they were found by a certain tiny doctor who had apparently been searching for them. 

“Oh Zoro, Sanji! There you are-”

Their moment was lost before it began and Sanji was already moving to get up.

“Oh sorry am I interrupting something?” 

He held himself as if nothing happened, seemingly trying to save face. Zoro could grant him that already moving to grab one of the fallen boxes. This didn't have to mean anything. The chef turned fully to chopper giving him a soft smile. 

“Not at all, Zoro and I were just moving the new ingredients I got into the kitchen.”

Sanji pointedly _didn’t_ look at Zoro. 

“Oh okay! I can help if you’d like!” 

“It’s okay Chopper we’re almost done”

Chopper received a pat for his kind offer and the tiny doctor nuzzled into it.

“Okay well Sanji, come to the infirmary after I have some super cool stuff to show you.”

“I’ll be there” 

Another soft smile and Chopper was off practically hopping his way down the deck. Sanji still kept Zoro out of view opting to light a cigarette and turning his back to him. While they were talking Zoro had already brought the three boxes into the kitchen and came back out. He made his way past the blonde going to grab the other boxes that were still waiting for them on the lawn of the Sunny but the blonde stopped him, grabbing his arm still refusing to look at the Moss' head or more accurately to let Zoro look at _ him._

"You're free to go I don't need your help anymore there's only a couple of boxes left."

At least ten different emotions passed through him at hearing those words. _ Of course, _ Sanji was going to make a big deal about this. The man was king of self-hatred and internalized homophobia.

To be honest the Mossman wasn't quite sure what to do. It wasn't like he could outright confront Sanji on this, and the alternative meant letting Sanji bottling up his feelings once again. There was a part of him, the soft part, that wanted to hug the fucking bastard and tell him to stop being a cunt to himself. And Zoro probably would have done it if he wasn’t two thousand percent sure that Sanji would shut him out. Although neither ever said it their relationship was built out of respect, so out of respect for Sanji wanting space he growled at the chef saying something along the lines of “Don’t wake me up if you don’t need my help dumbass.” 

He was sent flying.

It was certainly one way to deal with your problems.


End file.
